38 weeks and 1 day

I am 80% Effaced http://www.americanpregnancy.org/labornbirth/effacement.html


and I am dilated to 3


So. They kind of freaked since Cyler came with such a rapid labor and we live an hour away from the hospital but with no contractions or any pressure or lower back pain at the moment there was nothing they could do or send me to the hospital for.
So she basically told me if I feel ANY pressure, ANY backpain, if I so much as sneeze basically to go to the L&D.

If I can update via phone I will. Email me@ casmarisal@gmail.com or leave comments here , I can check them via phone since I don't have a laptop.

Wish us luck!!!

37weeks, 6 days

How much harder could it possibly get? You'll never hear me ask those questions.

Back pain was insane today, I couldn't get into the chiropractor today but do have an appointment set up tomorrow.
I swear I thought of going to the hospital. The whole "on a scale of 1 to 10 10 being unbearable" pain I'd rate it an 8. Early back labor, this could last for days and it's best to stay at home as long as possible unless: you have period like bleeding, contractions (in my case) 10 minutes apart for 1 hour, or my water breaks. The earlier you go to the hospital the higher your chances of having a C-Section will be, so they say wait it out at home where you will be more comfortable, as long as possible and that's what I am doing.

You know what my beef is with a C-Section? aside from having my arms tied down of course? having to stay in the hospital for 4 days away from Cyler. As it is I am doing everything in my power to go home 24 hours after baby is born, and as long as he is doing okay, my OB has agreed to that. She did say if he has any problems they will ask me to stay for 48 hours, of course I would, but if god forbid we have to repeat what we did with Cyler I would be released from the hospital and he would stay in NICU. God, that took its toll on me with Cyler and back then we lived down the street from the hospital, now we live an hour away from it. I'm not even thinking of that. But at least I know now; yes, things happen, sometimes babies have to stay in NICU for awhile, at least now if it where to happen it wouldn't be a total shock, I never even thought or mentally prepared myself for that possibility the first time around. I think that's what hurt me most. It was so new, and it went so wrong. I barely got to hold him that first week. All the tubes and how quiet and how dim the NICU was.

Other than that, I am on fire hot. I swear I think my forehead is about to start pouring sweat and I feel like fire hot heat is just radiating out of the pores of my body, its gross, I also feel swollen and tight like a little fat sausage, which is the grossest feeling, my hands keep going numb, I am pass out in my soup tired, and I still need to do things, like clean the bathrooms and my room needs to be moved around. As it is right now its like a bed room with a swing thrown here and a co-sleeper thrown there, exercise machine here, books piled ceiling high because I still don't have the friggin bookcase, car seat here, plastic bins of blankets there.
God I should just do this shit myself, whats the worse that can happen? my water break? ooh, I am shaking in my boots...

playing catch up!

Last night I thought I was in labor, I kind of freaked. I was like, shit, changed my mind, "can't do this, can't be in that kind of pain again" freaked. I'm probably dilating more! eeks! It's happening folks, its starting, I give it few days but honestly who really knows when, right? I've been exhausted, my system keeps clearing itself out, the back labor has begun despite there are no continuous contractions and my entire pelvis feels battered and bruised. There's too much change happening down there, daily. Go figure, days away from having a baby, woman freaks with anxiety. It's just that everything gets so physically intense it's kind of hard to keep it relatively together. All well wishes will be greatly appreciated.

and for those who love TMI updates here you go:
I had an OB check last Wednesday (the 19th) it went fine until she had fingers in my cervix. gah- dies of pain.

I am stationed at -3 (which is the first line up top)


I am 50% Effaced http://www.americanpregnancy.org/labornbirth/effacement.html


and I am dilated to 2


in other news!
I had tacos for dinner and they were grand! Some avocados too! and a cherry coke, which made me very happy despite the back pain. Tomorrow I will try to go to the chiropractor so we'll see what that brings on, the back pain is just making me batty with emotions I cannot explain. If I could manage to scrub the tub upstairs I would be soaking in some Epsom salt, I should just try to do that, I am at that point, let the Epsom soaks begin, god he's coming, I can feel it...

37 weeks

I'm going to try to be a big girl here and not rant and rave about how hard this is, how bad I hurt, or talk about those stabbing pains that strike in my vagina.
No. I will not. I will be brave, I will be strong.

So, believe it or not, I finally packed my hospital bags! Which turned into a small hospital suitcase and a little diaper bag filled with Baby Jake's outfits. Outfits? Well that's the thing, I couldn't decide on just one coming home outfit so I picked three and some beanies and some socks. The weather totally does not help here, yesterday it was 90 degrees at 4:30pm. Yeah, believe me, Arizona got a huge rant from this pregnant beast about that. But you see how it's kind of hard to know what to bring as in coming home outfit. You've got to have options.

Baby Laundry is washed and for the most part put away.

Husband has still NOT gone to Ikea to pick up Dressers or Bookcases so I have to snatch my sons "bookshelf" which is actually a changing table from his room this weekend which I am sure will be the first thing he will resent his parents for when he sees all of his stuffed animals and books on the floor of his room. Way to go! You know and I am not denying the man bust his ass to provide for his family, I see that, I know that, but you have had 37 weeks, say it with me, 37 weeks to do this, to get this done. It's not that hard. These things can be ordered and paid for by phone so all you have to do is go and pick them up but still! And when it does happen, when are they going to built? Throw me a bone, please, it's not like I am about to bare you a son from the peach pit of my womb right? Seriously. Men. And I do realize I am a pregnant hormonal nesting everything must be ready beast right now, I see that, I do but I swear to the baby gods I should have done all these things myself at the beginning. Ladies, you want something done on your timeline? do it yourself before you turned into a beached whale.

*wow, this is becoming another rant, yes? just wait, I am not done, but hey, I haven't brought up my vagina yet so we've still got that going for us*

*breathes*
moving on...

So last time I went to see my OB she did a check and I was not dilated by very very soft and she could feel the buns head. *wait, I am talking about it aren't I?* anyways, tomorrow I go back for my week 37 check. We also have an inducement date (your going to love this) from the day I found out my due date (December 9th) all I said was any day but December 2nd, I refuse to give birth on my Birthday. Well, low and behold, it's the only day my Dr can do it if I even make it to week 39. So unless I want unfamiliar OB with Man hands up in my, business, December 2nd it is.
All I wanted folks, all I wanted... So, now I have gone from saying No baby on Birthday, to Epidural on Birthday or I am taking names and doing some serious ass kicking later if the nurses take their sweet ass time, again.

That's the other thing ladies, if you haven't had a baby before, just know your nurse can make or break your delivery. The person you are appointed to that day is your everything, pray to God you get a great nurse who is kind and considerate and does not have her head up her ass or is bitchy because her 12 hour shift is coming to an end. Seriously. Pray. start now. Bust out your prayer beads and bow your heads, as I am now. While your at it, if you find yourself kind and loving and like praying, please pray I am granted a great OB nurse whenever the water breaks and I find myself, well, you know.

What else? just doing the best I can waiting it out. I am so agitated and sick of being so damn cooped up. I feel like a caged circus animal pacing in a tiny cage that you can barely walk and turn in. My husband treats me like I am on house arrest. God forbid I go anywhere, I might fall and die or something. Little does he know I walked to the mailbox the other day with my camera and did some shooting along the way. He'd crap his pants if he knew. Brother. Treat me like a child and I will defy you, just ask my Mother.

anyhoo, my favorite capture from our walk:
The Winter Effect:



If you are ever in the mood for killing some time go check out my print shop at Etsy:
I've been trying to put some more effort into it but it's kind of hard at this stage. It'd be nice to get more prints up there before baby comes though to have that done and taken care of though so keep your peepers posted if you enjoy my works. :)

Well, I guess I have given you all more than an ear full for the day. Mama needs a nap and a hot shower, or a hot shower and a nap. I hope you all are doing wonderfully and getting ready for Thanksgiving. I'm excited about it. Hopefully I'll be able to do it up and serve a great meal that day. Yum. Food.

Vote for Zach!

Will you?
I entered Zachs photo into JPG magazines "Beloved" theme.

If you would like to cast a vote for his precious face please do.
Thanks everyone.

vote here! http://www.jpgmag.com/photos/1225846

thanks luvs!

Cylerman

Making "Sand Angels" in his sandbox. Kids got resourceful skills down. ^_^


Attempt at Smiling for camera when Zach stole his attention.


"take a picture of me swinging fast fast fast!" ^_^


With a face like that how could I possibly stop at two?
and Baby Jake hasn't come out of the oven yet. ^_^

Picture post

Cyler was an astronaut for Halloween and had a blast!


Cyler last month


Baby Jake belly at 35 weeks! (I am wearing shorts you just cannot tell)

36 weeks

In my Zach post last week just about all of you asked how I was doing and I didn't respond. I live by a "no one likes a whiner" philosophy and I am at the stage of my pregnancy where nothing feels good. Even sleeping hurts.
but if you really must know...
My back is killing me.
I get cramps in my calves and I cannot reach below the knee to rub them out.
My bowels are furious.
every time I pee it feels like I am dilating.
contractions are not your not friend, whoever may tell you that they are is a big fat liar.
Every time I contract I cannot breathe because the movement my uterus creates squishes my lungs within my little torso.
My belly has new friends that are deeply grooved, thick, reddish purple lines.
I have split ends in my hair for the first time in over 10 years which makes cutting it a very easy thing to do but I'm holding out praying the short hair phase, passes.
and I feel like a giant swollen sausage, eww.

so, that is what I've been up to. I cannot wait until this is all said and done. I plan on starting walking a week after delivery, maybe sooner. My body is thrashed and I need to get it back into shape or my fibro will be a mess. I pray we have a decent thanksgiving, and for some reason November 22nd keeps popping up in my head, lets see why. Maybe, just maybe there will be a Birthday even though I am not due until the 9th of December and they plan on inducing a week early, as of Tuesday we'll be 36 weeks along and he'll be considered fullterm.
We've achieved our biggest goal. Lung Maturity!

So my dearest readers, I am sorry I am not on here much, updating and what not but I'm just in that place, that place where you go into hibernation before it happens. I hardly talk to anyone these days, I'm in the eye of the storm, embracing the quiet before it gets loud.

Much love and best wishes to you all!

Easy Schmeasy meatloaf

New Meatloaf recipe...

Ingredients
1 1/2 pounds ground beef

1 cup bread crumbs

1 onion, diced

1 egg, lightly beaten

1 teaspoons salt

1/2 teaspoon pepper

1/4 teaspoon dry mustard

1 (8-ounce) cans tomato sauce

1/4 cup barbecue sauce

2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce

1/2 cup milk

Sauce
1/4 cup tomato sauce,
2 teaspoons vinegar,
2 tablespoons brown sugar,
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce

Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Mix all of the ingredients. Form mixture into a loaf and place it in a shallow pan. Then, stir together the sauce ingredients. Pour this sauce over the meatloaf. Bake for 1 hour, at 350 degrees.

enjoy luvs!

Sweet Sweet Zach

It's been awhile since I have posted pictures of my beast. ^,^
add it to my laundry list of things I am running far far behind in, right?







Zach is officially 2 years old now! ^,^