I did something I said I wasn't going to do again...
I bought more maternity clothes with only 5 weeks left as of Tuesday.
Nothing fit anymore.
I've gone from a size S/M in Maternity to a L/XL. Sad sad day.
that may not sound like a big deal to many, trust me, I've heard it, but what I find funny is the people that roll their eyes about it are 5'6" + and I am not even 5'1"
back to buying more clothes, it's getting cold out (at night anyways).
And nothing would cover my belly anymore.
Do you know what that's like? It's akward. It's weird. It's, bare...
I'm having trouble breathing because I am so frickin little and packing so much weight my bodies not used to.
I feel like I am not getting enough oxygen.
I wake up and I feel like I haven't been breathing.
And I am sick of hearing "its perfectly "normal" I want to tell people to go eff off with that shit. I could grow a head out of my ass and they would say, "oh, it's perfectly normal"
I have giant baby in my belly. Feet and legs in ribs, head on bladder. My ribs HURT...
Plus, I've been so so so tired lately.
Barely keep my eyes open tired.
I tried watching a movie last night with J and I passed out.
I could feel contractions, and they didn't feel good.
I could feel something painful going on in the cervix area and it did not feel good.
But I was so tired and in a very rare moment I had managed to find a comfortable position. I just sat there, asleep, feeling everything that was going on, but to exhausted to open my eyes.
now that I think about it, it seems like a waste of money that I had to go and buy more maternity clothes. bleh.
tomorrow I make my Split Pea soup. Yum. if it wasn't for crock pots my family wouldn't eat anymore. I made the best chili & cornbread the other day. Its a godsend being able to just throw things in, turn a switch and walk away coming back to an actually meal 8 hours later.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Monday, October 20, 2008
WARNING: freak out and a birth story ahead
In six weeks I am "supposed to" have a baby.
I say "supposed to" because who knows if he'll come earlier than that but they will not be letting him come later than that.
Six weeks, say it with me. 1 2 3 4 5 6...weeks.
I just put together a list for my hospital bags and it dawned on me "HOLY CRAP" it's all becoming so very, very real.
I think I am having an anxiety attack, or it could just be that there is no breathing room for my lungs with this baby crammed into my short little body.
Where was I?
Oh yes, list for hospital bag. I have had an emergency bag packed with nothing much really just incase something went awry like a gush of fluids coming from my nether regions.
Phrases like "birth plan" make me laugh these days.
Oh did I have one the first time, along with all this stuff I brought.
More phrases that make me laugh this time around, like "Relaxation CD’s
time passers (magazines, a book, cards, baby book?)
hard candies, lollipops, oh and essential oils"
Did I use it all? hell no.
My water broke, it had been a hellish night filled with pain and I was sick. I hadn't slept. But no contractions, just pain.
So any ways, I remember, my water broke, I had just laid down in hopes of sleeping. I got up. walked to my closet, and thinking, "this isn't bad *I smiled* I can do this, this is fine" a minute passed and holy shit I thought I was going to die. The urge to push was there and I still had flights of stairs to go down to get to the car.
We get to the hospital, these frickin people are taking there sweet ass time. Finally I am in a room.
"your no where near being ready, you are only dilated to 4, you have plenty of time" blah blah blah . I had to push, my body as pushing and I had no control over stopping it. "Quit pushing" I'm not, my body is. I had no control.
after tons of "f bombs" and unjustly using Gods name in vain, the nurse looked at my husband because I quit answering her stupid effing questions.
(I honestly couldn't talk) and he said, look, she has back problems.
Nurse: ooh from the pregnancy
Husband: NO! before the pregnancy. She has back problems. physical therapy and chiropractic care here and there throughout the years.
Nurse: OH! call the anesthesiologist for the epideral.
*stupid stupid *
all of this happened within, oh, 15 minutes. The nurse is now rushing to get a bag of fluids into my body, squeezing as hard as she can because without that bag of fluids in me, or anyone, no epidural.
finally, it's in, epidural is in. I finally breathe. The little woman is a goddess in my eyes. My soul beams with love whenever I think of her to this day. She was barely 4ft 10 inches at most. But she was my hero. There was something grand motherly about here even though I could barely understand her accent. She stayed to watch Cyler be born. She was out of the way. She didn't say anything. She was like this angel. (can you tell I love the lady???) and then she was gone, and never saw her again. I don't even know her name.
(I was dead set against an epidural or any drugs in general, and I now know what my physical therapist meant when she told me when she said if you ever get pregnant your going to have a hard time and have a hard labor, those words had completely slipped away from my mind, totally forgotten).
Back to the story: they do another exam because they didn't dare attempt do another before the epidural was in place.
Nurse: wow, she's ready to go.
dilation not only went from 4-10 in a flash but time to rock & roll.
They let me rest for an hour before that happened though.
Doing massages in hopes to prevent an episiotomy. I still needed one but I am glad I had one instead of tore from my little mans giant almost 9lb body.
So there you have it folks. My water broke February 24th 2005 at 5:24 am, I was at the hospital by 6 am and Cyler was born at 8:28.
*where was I again? ooh yeah, packing a hospital bag*
I say "supposed to" because who knows if he'll come earlier than that but they will not be letting him come later than that.
Six weeks, say it with me. 1 2 3 4 5 6...weeks.
I just put together a list for my hospital bags and it dawned on me "HOLY CRAP" it's all becoming so very, very real.
I think I am having an anxiety attack, or it could just be that there is no breathing room for my lungs with this baby crammed into my short little body.
Where was I?
Oh yes, list for hospital bag. I have had an emergency bag packed with nothing much really just incase something went awry like a gush of fluids coming from my nether regions.
Phrases like "birth plan" make me laugh these days.
Oh did I have one the first time, along with all this stuff I brought.
More phrases that make me laugh this time around, like "Relaxation CD’s
time passers (magazines, a book, cards, baby book?)
hard candies, lollipops, oh and essential oils"
Did I use it all? hell no.
My water broke, it had been a hellish night filled with pain and I was sick. I hadn't slept. But no contractions, just pain.
So any ways, I remember, my water broke, I had just laid down in hopes of sleeping. I got up. walked to my closet, and thinking, "this isn't bad *I smiled* I can do this, this is fine" a minute passed and holy shit I thought I was going to die. The urge to push was there and I still had flights of stairs to go down to get to the car.
We get to the hospital, these frickin people are taking there sweet ass time. Finally I am in a room.
"your no where near being ready, you are only dilated to 4, you have plenty of time" blah blah blah . I had to push, my body as pushing and I had no control over stopping it. "Quit pushing" I'm not, my body is. I had no control.
after tons of "f bombs" and unjustly using Gods name in vain, the nurse looked at my husband because I quit answering her stupid effing questions.
(I honestly couldn't talk) and he said, look, she has back problems.
Nurse: ooh from the pregnancy
Husband: NO! before the pregnancy. She has back problems. physical therapy and chiropractic care here and there throughout the years.
Nurse: OH! call the anesthesiologist for the epideral.
*stupid stupid *
all of this happened within, oh, 15 minutes. The nurse is now rushing to get a bag of fluids into my body, squeezing as hard as she can because without that bag of fluids in me, or anyone, no epidural.
finally, it's in, epidural is in. I finally breathe. The little woman is a goddess in my eyes. My soul beams with love whenever I think of her to this day. She was barely 4ft 10 inches at most. But she was my hero. There was something grand motherly about here even though I could barely understand her accent. She stayed to watch Cyler be born. She was out of the way. She didn't say anything. She was like this angel. (can you tell I love the lady???) and then she was gone, and never saw her again. I don't even know her name.
(I was dead set against an epidural or any drugs in general, and I now know what my physical therapist meant when she told me when she said if you ever get pregnant your going to have a hard time and have a hard labor, those words had completely slipped away from my mind, totally forgotten).
Back to the story: they do another exam because they didn't dare attempt do another before the epidural was in place.
Nurse: wow, she's ready to go.
dilation not only went from 4-10 in a flash but time to rock & roll.
They let me rest for an hour before that happened though.
Doing massages in hopes to prevent an episiotomy. I still needed one but I am glad I had one instead of tore from my little mans giant almost 9lb body.
So there you have it folks. My water broke February 24th 2005 at 5:24 am, I was at the hospital by 6 am and Cyler was born at 8:28.
*where was I again? ooh yeah, packing a hospital bag*
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Good Eats, the Costco Way
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Crock Pot Split Pea Soup
Left over Ham??? Have I got the solution for you! ;)
Crock Pot Split Pea Soup
Ingredients:
1 (16 ounce) package dried split peas, rinsed
2 cups diced ham
3 carrots, peeled and finely sliced
1 yellow onion, minced
2 stalks celery, plus leaves, finely diced
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 bay leaves
1 tablespoon seasoning salt (Kirklands Signiture seasoning salt is awesome)
1/2 teaspoon fresh pepper
1/4 teaspoon thyme
1/4 teaspoon dry mustard*
1/4 cup dry red wine*
1 1/2 quarts hot water
Directions:
1. Layer ingredients in crockpot.
2. Pour in water, so don't stir.
3. Cover and cook on high 4-5 hours or on low for 8-10 hours.
4. Remove Bay leaves.
5. Let cool so you do not burn the bejeezus out of your mouth. ;)
ingredients marked with "*" are optional as in if you don't have them, you can make this anyways and it will come out great, but if you do have them, do not hesitate to use them, you can taste the difference.
Crock Pot Split Pea Soup
Ingredients:
1 (16 ounce) package dried split peas, rinsed
2 cups diced ham
3 carrots, peeled and finely sliced
1 yellow onion, minced
2 stalks celery, plus leaves, finely diced
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 bay leaves
1 tablespoon seasoning salt (Kirklands Signiture seasoning salt is awesome)
1/2 teaspoon fresh pepper
1/4 teaspoon thyme
1/4 teaspoon dry mustard*
1/4 cup dry red wine*
1 1/2 quarts hot water
Directions:
1. Layer ingredients in crockpot.
2. Pour in water, so don't stir.
3. Cover and cook on high 4-5 hours or on low for 8-10 hours.
4. Remove Bay leaves.
5. Let cool so you do not burn the bejeezus out of your mouth. ;)
ingredients marked with "*" are optional as in if you don't have them, you can make this anyways and it will come out great, but if you do have them, do not hesitate to use them, you can taste the difference.
Mac & Cheese with Broccoli Trees
A little man approving home run! ^.^
*Ingredients:
1 package(s) (16 ounces)pasta shells
2 tablespoon(s) margarine or butter
3 tablespoon(s) all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon(s) ground black pepper ground nutmeg
3 1/2 cup(s) 1% milk
6 ounce(s) (1 1/2 cups)sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
1/3 cup(s) grated Parmesan cheese
1 package(s) (10 ounces) frozen broccoli (Steamfresh)
*Directions:
1. Heat large saucepot of salted water to boiling over high heat; add pasta and cook as label directs.
2. Meanwhile, in 3-quart saucepan, melt margarine over medium heat. With wire whisk, stir in flour, pepper, nutmeg, and 1 teaspoon salt; cook 1 minute, stirring constantly. Gradually whisk in milk and, stirring constantly, cook over medium-high heat until sauce boils and thickens slightly. Boil 1 minute, stirring.
3. Remove saucepan from heat; stir in cheeses just until melted. Use immersion blender to blend mixture in saucepan until smooth. (Or, in blender at low speed, with center part of cover removed to allow steam to escape, blend sauce mixture in small batches until smooth. Pour sauce into bowl after each batch.)
4. Cook the broccoli (I buy "steamfresh" the veggie bags you just pop into the microwave for 4 to 5 minutes for awesome veggies every time). Carefully open bag and drain in Colander. Set aside in bowl
5. Drain Pasta in colander; Return pasta mixture to saucepot; stir in cheese sauce.
Enjoy!
I usually serve this with cubed chicken breast for a kiddie friendly dinner.
**edited to add: I love adding cherry tomatoes in my bowl, the boys don't really care for them but I think it brings out a lovely flavor. :)
*Ingredients:
1 package(s) (16 ounces)pasta shells
2 tablespoon(s) margarine or butter
3 tablespoon(s) all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/4 teaspoon(s) ground black pepper ground nutmeg
3 1/2 cup(s) 1% milk
6 ounce(s) (1 1/2 cups)sharp cheddar cheese, shredded
1/3 cup(s) grated Parmesan cheese
1 package(s) (10 ounces) frozen broccoli (Steamfresh)
*Directions:
1. Heat large saucepot of salted water to boiling over high heat; add pasta and cook as label directs.
2. Meanwhile, in 3-quart saucepan, melt margarine over medium heat. With wire whisk, stir in flour, pepper, nutmeg, and 1 teaspoon salt; cook 1 minute, stirring constantly. Gradually whisk in milk and, stirring constantly, cook over medium-high heat until sauce boils and thickens slightly. Boil 1 minute, stirring.
3. Remove saucepan from heat; stir in cheeses just until melted. Use immersion blender to blend mixture in saucepan until smooth. (Or, in blender at low speed, with center part of cover removed to allow steam to escape, blend sauce mixture in small batches until smooth. Pour sauce into bowl after each batch.)
4. Cook the broccoli (I buy "steamfresh" the veggie bags you just pop into the microwave for 4 to 5 minutes for awesome veggies every time). Carefully open bag and drain in Colander. Set aside in bowl
5. Drain Pasta in colander; Return pasta mixture to saucepot; stir in cheese sauce.
Enjoy!
I usually serve this with cubed chicken breast for a kiddie friendly dinner.
**edited to add: I love adding cherry tomatoes in my bowl, the boys don't really care for them but I think it brings out a lovely flavor. :)
Monday, October 13, 2008
With a face like this
It's impossible, to stay mad, long... ^.^
and lastly,
If this is "as good as it gets"
I'm the luckiest Mama to walk the face of the Earth.
*I do however dread the day he begins dating. ugh*
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Your inner fat kids ultimate fantasy
So doing some online last of the last baby shopping I see this:
yeah. I know.
29.99 will buy you:
24 Nibblers® bite-sized cookies
24 brownie bites
2 pumpkin frosted cookies
2 chocolate grahams cookies
Halloween pail
Net food weight: 2.3 lb
oh and the selling point is the pail will come in handy on Halloween night.
Costco, I love you, but I hate you, but I love you...
I could make my own damn everything in this pail but I am far to tired to do that, hell, I think I am far to tired to go to the grocery store to buy cookies and all the other things I need...
This would cheer me up, unfortunately, I am fairly sure it would leave me unable to move during the rest of the pregnancy...
Monday, October 6, 2008
The Cheeky Threes
Cyler has turned into such a cheeky bird.
Constantly talking back for everything from washing his hands, to eating, picking up toys.
Yowza and holy crap man. If I said no to my Mother in such a tone like that when I was his age (or even older than that) I am sure I would be toothless today.
I am just floored (and if you couldn't tell, stumped). I'm in my third trimester so I try to choose my battles pretty wisely. The very rare times I actually yell I end up having contractions. I cannot win. Plus our house is a yell free zone, yelling really stresses the bejeezus out of me.
Tonight he didn't want to help pick up his toys, then wash his hands before dinner. So I told him fine. Turned off his movie and told him to go to bed without dinner. He grumbled what must be curse words in the three-year old world and cleaned up then washed his hands.
I hear people talk about terrible twos ~terrible twos my expanding ass.
No one talks about the cheeky threes. Oh God how no one mentioned the cheeky threes...
A pack of Mothers who have raised kids who have turned out all right need to write a book, no, a bible, on the things so many parents forget to mention in passing. Like, ha, you think teething is bad, you think the terrible twos blow, well let me tell you, three is going to turn you gray.
Actually there is a book I am thinking of getting, http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Your-Spirited-Child-Perceptive/dp/0060923288
I guess that's what they are called these days, "spirited." Spirit... go spirit...
Constantly talking back for everything from washing his hands, to eating, picking up toys.
Yowza and holy crap man. If I said no to my Mother in such a tone like that when I was his age (or even older than that) I am sure I would be toothless today.
I am just floored (and if you couldn't tell, stumped). I'm in my third trimester so I try to choose my battles pretty wisely. The very rare times I actually yell I end up having contractions. I cannot win. Plus our house is a yell free zone, yelling really stresses the bejeezus out of me.
Tonight he didn't want to help pick up his toys, then wash his hands before dinner. So I told him fine. Turned off his movie and told him to go to bed without dinner. He grumbled what must be curse words in the three-year old world and cleaned up then washed his hands.
I hear people talk about terrible twos ~terrible twos my expanding ass.
No one talks about the cheeky threes. Oh God how no one mentioned the cheeky threes...
A pack of Mothers who have raised kids who have turned out all right need to write a book, no, a bible, on the things so many parents forget to mention in passing. Like, ha, you think teething is bad, you think the terrible twos blow, well let me tell you, three is going to turn you gray.
Actually there is a book I am thinking of getting, http://www.amazon.com/Raising-Your-Spirited-Child-Perceptive/dp/0060923288
I guess that's what they are called these days, "spirited." Spirit... go spirit...
Saturday, October 4, 2008
out of commission
Cyler has been fighting something for a bit now.
I thought it was bad allergies, then a nasty cold, now bad allergies?
It got pretty nasty last night but he appears to be doing better as of now.
*shrugs*
As of the 7th I am 31 weeks pregnant and am anemic.
8 weeks left to delievery if we make it that long.
I think J's kinda freaking out silently because it is so close...
Welcome to the club bud. *evil snickers*
I thought my fibromyalgia kicking my ass but maybe its just the anemia?
Hopefully the suppliments will help. I'm walking around like "girlfriend in a coma."
Aside from Fridays OB appointment I'd officially be one of those people who never leave their house.
It's so frustrating not being able to get things done.
I can't even blog. I am seriously forcing myself to write this.
There's so much domestication I want to blog about.
Like why in the bloody hell does this have to be so expensive???
http://www.ergobabycarriers.com/babycarriers/item/BC11G
and recipes. I am working on fall recipes for all of you wonderful blog readers.
I hope you love Pumpkin 'cause tis the season and I just cannot get enough of it...
I hope I'll have more energy withen a few days of suppliments and loads and loads of rest. I have to brave grocery shopping later. Wish me luck.
There will be tons of tea drank before hand. I should be fine.
In other news: Thanks the Gods for crock pots who make making dinner possible.
:)
I thought it was bad allergies, then a nasty cold, now bad allergies?
It got pretty nasty last night but he appears to be doing better as of now.
*shrugs*
As of the 7th I am 31 weeks pregnant and am anemic.
8 weeks left to delievery if we make it that long.
I think J's kinda freaking out silently because it is so close...
Welcome to the club bud. *evil snickers*
I thought my fibromyalgia kicking my ass but maybe its just the anemia?
Hopefully the suppliments will help. I'm walking around like "girlfriend in a coma."
Aside from Fridays OB appointment I'd officially be one of those people who never leave their house.
It's so frustrating not being able to get things done.
I can't even blog. I am seriously forcing myself to write this.
There's so much domestication I want to blog about.
Like why in the bloody hell does this have to be so expensive???
http://www.ergobabycarriers.com/babycarriers/item/BC11G
and recipes. I am working on fall recipes for all of you wonderful blog readers.
I hope you love Pumpkin 'cause tis the season and I just cannot get enough of it...
I hope I'll have more energy withen a few days of suppliments and loads and loads of rest. I have to brave grocery shopping later. Wish me luck.
There will be tons of tea drank before hand. I should be fine.
In other news: Thanks the Gods for crock pots who make making dinner possible.
:)
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